Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Postgame Coach Pep Talk

From deep within the Rich Liberal Trendy Cause Stadium:

"Okay, men, helluva win this week, helluva win! First and foremost, someone give me the game ball. Come up here, Law Firm! This is for you - way to step up on Monday Night Football!

All around, good work men! This win is a big first step towards our goal of reaching the playoffs and taking a shot at that DDL title, but we've got a long way to go. I don't want anyone in this room to feel content. If you are content with your performance, you can get out now.

And I'm not just looking at you, D-Will. <glares at DeAngelo Williams>. If you had a tough week, you know it and I'm damn sure you'll be back ready to go Week Two and for the rest of the season. But you veterans, you're the leaders of this team. Tom (Brady), you were totally solid, made no mistakes. All right, all right, decent week. But we didn't trade for you to get "solid" performances. You need to fight to improve! Every single week, your goal is to do better than the week before! Everyone does that, and come Week Sixteen, we'll be playing for the championship.

Ok, personnel moves. First off, congrats, CJ (Spiller), you're gonna be starting next week. RB1, so bring your A game and make us proud! D-Will, you're riding pine until you show me you've got the heart to carry the rock and find the end zone. Everyone else, look sharp - we've got waiver changes pending so you'll know your status by Thursday morning. Remember, though, on this team there's one rule: Earn. Your. Spot. Make it impossible for me to take that starting job from your hands.

Again, great start to the season, everyone. Keep it up and I guarantee we'll be playing meaningful December fantasy football games. Everyone in here, on three, 'for the Cause." One, two, THREE!"


"Ok, get outta here. Oh, Kendall Wright, meet me in my office. Bring your playbook."

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